Time does not exist anymore, I had no idea what time it was: the snow come down now abundant, to cover everything with his white coat. I wandered for hours along the sidewalks, staring into space, and with horrible anxiety gripped the soul.
Mentre il suono insistente del cellulare continuava a scandire ogni istante.
Immagini che si susseguivano davanti ai miei occhi, di lui con quel bambino in braccio, la tenerezza, la dolcezza con cui lo guardava. . . e ancora lui, le sue mani su quel corpo perfetto, su quelle labbra rosse, carnose, su quella pelle ambrata, a cercare piacere, a dare piacere. . . nell’estasi dei sensi.
. . . Non c’è un solo istante in cui io non viva nel terrore di perderti . . .
Era dunque questo il timore nascosto tra quelle parole. Mi aveva celato delle verità inconfessabili, perseverando nella menzogna.
Come aveva potuto?
Portai le mani tra i capelli, sconvolta.
Nauseata.
Confusa.
La mia anima totalmente distrutta, distraught. . .
How could I meet his eyes ? C ome I could watch again her face , hear his voice?
walked non-stop, slow steps, aimed at a specific location, poised between the desire to believe the words of the woman, who had loved him unconditionally, which continued to love him with a dedication extreme, the mother of his son, that son who had never wanted to accept. . . and the ability to hear the truth directly from his lips. . . in the ditch effort to drag up from the abyss that was sinking the love that seemed destined to perish forever.
She had for what it really was, she had loved him, gave him a son. . . and it was she who had returned, when all seemed lost between us. A search for his body, to seek his lips. . . while I was in that hospital bed, with a heavy heart.
closed my eyes, while an unbearable nausea mi impediva di respirare.
Era dunque quello l’essere puro che mi aveva giurato amore eterno?
Lacrime incessanti, singulti violenti a scuotermi l’anima, il corpo, fino a ridurmi ad un’entità priva di forze, di volontà, di pensiero.
Osservando le impronte lasciate dai miei passi in quella neve soffice, giunsi fino al portone, sollevando il braccio, la mano tremante a pigiare il tasto del campanello:
- Isabella ? - due smeraldi intensi mi fissarono spalancati - Cristo! Ma cosa ti è successo?. . . Sei. . sei zuppa d’acqua! -
Rimasi li, sull’uscio, sotto quella neve che scendeva nel suo lento moto incessante.
- Dimmi che non è vero - In a trance, his voice hoarse. . . as a lament.
My swollen eyes, staring at that beautiful face, an unearthly beauty, so perfect and yet so damn artifact. Pending.
- What. . . what you mean? - The voice full of anxiety, upset.
- Estela. . . -
that name. . .
A deafening silence, punctuated by moments endless sound of our breathing. As the snow continued to fall silent, flooding everything, everywhere, all around us.
A deep sigh. I saw him bow his head. eyes closed. Fists clenched :
- You do not know the torment that destroys my soul from the moment when I decided to celarti the truth. But if I did, it was purely and simply because I was terrified of losing you -
froze their breath, as I felt the blood freeze in my veins.
last time I looked at him, setting the memory forever in my eyes.
- I've lost forever Edward -
I turned down for the last time those steps.
- Isabella! No! - The anguish in his voice while screaming my name.
His hand on my arm to stop me.
front of me, his pupils dilated, his mouth wide open, shocked.
That angelic face, beautiful, perfect, those soft lips, slightly open, her eyes filled with terror:
- Do not leave me Isabella! -
lifted an arm, pushing the one hand, the disdain on my face:
- I do not want see you again - the tone of dry, hard.
The shortness of breath, nervously shaking his head, arms at your sides, those two emerald green, bright, intense, wonderful stared at me full of despair, through tears
- I can not live without you. . . and will fight with all my strength to carry you in my arms -
was over.
Forever.
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