Yerab: quando la vita ricomincia... nonostante tutto
now runs two small businesses, selling alcoholic beverages, tea, coffee and enjera, and shows us pride in the spaces where they perform these activities, but to get what he has now due Yerab Yesmanem has been through a lot and more than once if the view is really bad.
lives in Debre Markos for eleven years now, but is originally from the woreda Abazashi Sinan, from which he left when she was widowed and without means to feed his two children. The problems, however, had begun long before. His father died when she was a child, fell ill suddenly went off in just over two weeks, without having recourse to the visits to a doctor and without finding out what his problem. When he was fifteen, her mother forced to marry against her will, a man who did not know why "the tradition was thus:" At that time - she explains with a hint of sadness in his eyes, while staring at nothing - not was common the girls went to school and receive an education in more than my mother was very poor and there were three other children, two boys and a girl, to deal with. The only alternative that presented itself to me was to get married. I was not happy but this is our culture, then things were not like now and I could not do otherwise. " Although the marriage was not to her nor sought nor wanted, Yerab soon began to grow fond and loving man that her mother had chosen for her. He came from a farming family and his parents at the time of the wedding, gave him a land that became the main source of livelihood for the young couple. Recalling the life with her husband, smiling softly, almost shameful: he was well enough to not beat her and was not rude, though there were still some tensions. The problems arose when he threatened to avenge the murder of his grandfather fearing the willingness to sell animals to buy a gun, Yerab did not share that idea at all, or those times you went in town for the market and, after drinking, spent the night outside the home. Especially in the latter case, she returned to live with his mother and him every time he went to take it back apologizing. From that marriage were born two sons: the sweet Bayelign Yechalem and brother, who currently have respectively 15 and 12 years. Unfortunately, alla gioia per la nascita del secondo seguì un triste momento per Yerab: la madre cominciò a star male, bloccata a letto da continui spasmi di vomito. I soldi per portarla in ospedale non c’erano e il marito di Yerab non era disposto a vendere i capi di bestiame per ottenere la somma necessaria per le cure. Così, la donna usufruì solo dell’acqua santa a cui spesso la tradizione ricorre in caso di malattia, ma senza ricavarne benefici, e dopo tre mesi morì. Un brutto colpo per Yerab, ma questo era solo l’inizio.
A distanza di un anno, si trovò di nuovo ad affrontare la malattia di una persona cara, questa volta si trattava del marito e la situazione fu ancora più difficile per lei. L’uomo cominciò a tossire pesantemente e ad aggravarsi giorno dopo giorno: in ospedale gli diagnosticarono la tubercolosi. Per tre mesi rimase a letto in casa, sotto le vigili cure della moglie, mentre i fratelli di lui e di lei si occupavano dei campi. Per poterlo curare nella maniera migliore Yerab chiese anche un prestito ai vicini di casa, ma non ci fu nulla da fare per l’uomo che morì lasciandola sola con i due bimbi, di cui il più piccolo di appena un anno. La seconda perdita in poco tempo e ancora più difficile da sopportare. Ora, tutte le responsabilità erano sulle sue spalle: in un primo momento riuscì a mandare avanti la casa e sfamare se stessa e i piccoli, grazie alle riserve che avevano messo da parte precedentemente, come si usa fare nelle aree rurali. Dopo circa un anno, le scorte però finirono e le cose cominciarono a complicarsi terribilmente, anche perché per restituire i soldi presi in prestito dai vicini fu costretta a vendere gli unici animali che possedeva, un bue e una mucca. Come se quanto finora successo non fosse abbastanza, ci si mise anche la famiglia del defunto a crearle problemi: quando l’uomo era in vita i suoi genitori avevano sempre preteso parte del raccolto, ma ora che lui era venuto a mancare volevano addirittura indietro il terreno e, per di più, pretendevano in custodia anche uno dei figli della coppia. Yerab non poté far altro che restituire il campo, ma si rifiutò di dare loro in custodia i bambini. La questione, però, a quel punto era come sfamarli e assicurare loro una vita dignitosa. Nei suoi sogni c’era anche quello di poterli mandare a scuola e far in modo che ricevessero quell’educazione di cui lei era stata privata.
Yerab era veramente disperata, giovane ma già con tanta sofferenza nel cuore e duri pesi da sopportare, senza opportunità e con un futuro davanti che si prospettava tutto in salita. La zona rurale dove viveva non le offriva molte chance, così decise di buttarsi, di rischiare spostandosi sola in città. Con la scusa di andare al mercato lasciò i due bambini al fratello e, senza rivelare le sue reali intenzioni, si trasferì a Debre Markos, dove trovò quasi subito un’occupazione come domestica a casa di un commerciante. L’uomo aveva a small bar where he sold beer and other alcoholic drinks and Yerab Dividends are among the services in house, from six in the morning to midnight, which received 15 ETB (about 83 euro cents) per month, and work at local level where no But it was only a mere maid. The extreme need for money drove her, in fact, working as a prostitute for the patrons of the bar. "It was very hard, - said in a faint voice - but I need so much money, I wanted to win as much as possible to be able to raise my children. I wanted to come back soon to resume my brother's house and take them to live with me. " Yerab knew that prostitution would run the risk, but for his children was ready to go all: "Something I had heard about HIV, even though I was not well informed. I knew it was better to use a condom and asking customers to wear it, but often refused. I had to accept the money if I wanted to have sex without taking precautions for the money and eventually I agreed. " Shortly after his arrival at Debre Markos her brother went to look, she explained that she was working as a maid to earn money to raise children, but kept secret his second job, so the man agreed to deal with for a while 'grandchildren while waiting for his return. For six months Yerab did this terrible life, until he managed to accumulate 800 ETB and rent a house for fifty ETB per month. Then he bought needed to start a small business, initially as needed to sell tea and bread and beer and also over time enjera. After three weeks, returned to his home area to recover the children and take them to Debre Markos. The oldest was six years now: the right age to go to school but also for small jobs. He arranged for her to start studying but also bought him the set to work as a shoeshine in their free time so that he could contribute to the household economy. The revenues are still too limited for the needs of the family and Yerab sought help from government offices, so that gave a loan to poter incrementare la sua attività. Ottenuto il denaro, da restituire in due anni, la situazione sembrava migliorare a poco a poco: le vendite stavano lievemente crescendo, lei poteva comprarsi i materiali necessari per preparare thè e quant’altro, che di solito prendeva in prestito dai vicini, e ora anche il secondo figlio poteva andare a scuola. Sembrava finalmente aver trovato la sua strada e, ricorda con uno sguardo pieno di rammarico, raggiunto una certa serenità.
Purtroppo però in agguato c’era un altro nemico da combattere ed era alquanto minaccioso: quattro anni fa Yerab cominciò a star male, dolori di testa e gastrite. Purtroppo, nonostante le prime cure la sua salute continuava a peggiorare vistosamente e i dottori le consigliarono di fare il test dell’HIV. In quel momento le sue conoscenze sull’AIDS erano maggiori dei tempi in cui lavorava come prostituta, aveva infatti avuto la possibilità di partecipare ad uno dei training che gli uffici governativi organizzano con le ONG e aveva chiari in mente quali erano i rischi che correva. Non fu facile per lei sottoporsi a quell’esame del sangue, la paura era tanta: “Mi domandavo come avrei fatto ad accudire i miei figli se fossi risultata sieropositiva e temevo che i miei clienti non avrebbero più voluto bere e mangiare quanto preparavo”, spiega con un’espressione di rassegnazione. Tentennò un po’ cercando di prendere tempo, poi cedette e si sottopose al test: purtroppo per the result was that she feared he had contracted the virus and those complaints were symptoms of that terrible disease called AIDS. That was a horrible moment for Yerab, terrified by this deadly virus, but even more the risk of being discriminated against, including antiretroviral treatment frightened her, he feared the effects and not be persuaded to begin. The disease was there, however, could not ignore it and eventually did force el'affrontò, beginning to take the medicines prescribed by doctors. Among the indications provided by health professionals were also the ones to join an association of people with HIV based in Debre Markos, promoted by the Italian Community Volunteers for the World along with government offices such as the HAPCO. Despite getting to grips with the same disease, the virus and the consequences could have in his life within the community so much too frightened Yerab waited more than six months before contacting the association. It was decided only when he discovered that his neighbor was a member and that he was very satisfied at that point he put aside his qualms and approached the group. An important step because at that moment he became aware of the fact that there are many people like her, living with HIV but who lead a normal life. There, she realized that she was not alone, that should not be afraid to reveal their status and there are people willing to help if you have good will and willingness to work.
But things were about to fall again: if at the drugs had not created special problems, over the months, perhaps because of inadequate diet and too much work, Yerab began to feel increasingly ill until to be confined to bed for long periods. Too weak to take care of his business, too hard to stand before the fire to prepare the drinks, with constant abdominal pain that left her in peace. His body could not adapt to the heavy antiretrovirals. That situation continued for about a year with ups and downs, in which the woman could not work regularly and began to lose his bar customers. I can never have enough money and children were forced either to odd jobs to scrape together a little 'money. About three years ago, his body finally began to respond better to treatment and she slowly, took up his life. But those months also had had severe effects on its business as dealers and sales slow to recover. Then came the precious help of the association: Yerab followed the training for people with AIDS in basic business skills in applying for a loan. A year ago they were granted three thousand ETB: With that money he bought new raw materials to prepare drinks and meals and able to rent another room to use as a bar. Now sells alcoholic and non alcoholic accompanied by enjera at home and in a small little place just a few yards from where he lives. To manage these two areas has also hired two young helpers. It is now more peaceful, the burden of suffering and difficulties faced not ever give up when he talks in his eyes there is always a little sad, but the darkest moments have passed, and can take care of himself, his two sons and younger sister moved to live with her. "I'm better - admits, smiling -. What I want now is to return the money I had to borrow and save the rest to build a house of my own. I would also like to My children receive an education and find a good job. "
Camilla Corradini
(CVM Volunteer in Ethiopia)